Sat, 04/02/2022 - 12:21am

Topsy-Turvy World

From robotic kennel help to a new dress code in the ring, which way is up?

For more than two years, we have been living in a topsy-turvy world. Nothing is normal anymore. Businesses are unable to perform well due to the fact that they cannot hire adequate help. Everyone in every business has jacked prices sky high. It seems Covid has created a new world order.

Consider that many of our greatest professional handlers are turning to the world of artificial intelligence as they explore technology to see if they can purchase robotic help to serve as kennel and show assistants. After all, you do not have to feed robots or deal with their moods once they have been paid for. Furthermore, once trained, you can count on them. Rumor has it that Bill McFadden will be the distributor/broker and plans to make more money than handling dogs with the venture!

In fact, professional handlers point out that they might not make more than 100 shows a year because the profit margin would be enhanced. Furthermore, since all dog publications have vowed to publish their annuals with free advertising to allow those best dogs owned by the poorest people to have equal opportunity for bragging rights, each New Year might be a different scenario.

This is all the more likely since lady exhibitors have agreed they will not wear makeup nor show cleavage in the future. Needless to say, there will be a new order among the Top Dogs, and an American Hairless is predicted to win BIS at Westminster by 2030 with the Goldendoodle to go RBIS!

Meanwhile, the word in New York is that AKC has promised to follow its mission statement dedicated to purebred dogs. Exhibitors and show chairs are delighted with the kennel club’s decision to waive recording fees for 2023 to allow small all-breed clubs to get out of the red. In addition, now all kennel clubs will have a membership consisting of at least 50 percent of working members under the age of 40!

Our most popular judge has decided he will no longer weigh or measure dogs. The judging and exhibiting community is happy with this decision.

MB-F, Onofrio, Foy Trent and BaRay are bidding to be the superintendent of choice for the first all-breed show to be held in space with Elon Musk as show chairman.

Exhibitors will always be happy with their placements. No more nasty remarks at dog shows or on social media leading to the elimination of the “hasn’t got a clue” statement. And never again will anybody play the “Covid card.” 

HAPPY APRIL FOOL’S DAY!

 

 

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