Editorial: December 16, 2022

• World peace.

• A premium list where you don't say, “Wow, when did they get that group?”

• A list of previously watched movies on Netflix.

• A judging panel where you recognize every judge’s name.

• Clean air.

• An end to advertising no-nos … Pictured going Reserve Winners to a broken major, making the cut of the final nine in the group, winning Best of Breed over the number-one dog in the breed, winning under esteemed breed authority and expert, Rex received his Triple Uranium Squared 3 Grand Championship without ever winning a Best of Breed in his entire show career.

• Double Stuf Oreo cookies.

• To meet a judge who doesn’t think they should be an all-breed judge.

• For the driver in the left lane going 45 to move over.

• Mailed and printed judging schedules.

• Enough milk in the refrigerator to cover the cornflakes.

• Judging schedules that don't stop midday that reminds you of a math equation ETFBJ-MA=WYWMAAMTBJ. Or estimated time for breed judging minus absentees = Why you were marked absent and missed the breed judging, or just reduce to WTF.

• Majors.

• Hair on my head, not my ears.

• No judging before 9 a.m.

• Self-cleaning kitty-litter trays.

• Sunday dinners that don't include a drive through. 

• Clean indoor and outdoor public ex-pens.

• To lose 30 pounds.

• A moratorium on saving parking spots with parking cones.

• Home-delivered newspapers that stay dry in the rain.

• Free grooming space for all.

• Someone to pump gas.

• Decent food at dog shows.

• That missing sock.

• Dogs that don't get carsick, chew their legs or bark incessantly.

• A forgiving policeman when he stops you for speeding.

• A full-length mirror in the ladies room so you can take a look behind.

• Most of all, a very Merry Christmas and holiday season and all the best that we wish the New Year will bring you. Happy New Year from all of us at Dog News, and thank you for your support through the years; it is very much appreciated.